I sit here on the love seat in my grandmother’s house, bothered by the fact that she speaks judgement, just as I’ve heard many people of her religion do so, for months and years and my entire existence since I’ve learned how to comprehend language.

Let me preface the rest of this post by saying that I love my grandmother to pieces, just as I love many others who share her religious views. In addition, I understand that those who declare themselves atheists may become poisonous and judgemental towards other groups of people, just as much as religious people. However, this particular blog post is about my views on religions’ potential to be poisonous, particularly Christianity. Therefore, if you argue that non religious people are judgemental too, I will view your input as irrelevant to this particular post. 🙂

I grew up in the church. Was raised in a non denominational, small, close knit church. I was baptized by choice, and a proud attendee of summer youth camp every single summer that we could afford it.

Growing up, the church did some really wonderful things for me. They (along with two caring parents), gave me strong moral foundations that I will carry for the rest of my life; treat others as you want to be treated, love deeply and don’t use the “hate” word, don’t lie, steal or cheat, and quite a few more. I was blessed with some lifelong friends (who have also moved away from the church we attended as children), and given the opportunity to spend time with young kids as I taught the toddler Sunday School class for quite some time. For these things, I will be forever grateful.

However, as I grew mentally, physically, and emotionally; I’ve developed my own moral beliefs and self standards. I’ve realized that not everything in the church is as it seems to outsiders, and some of the morals the church instilled in me, are no longer found within the hearts and spirits of those who I know to be Christians.

The Holy Bible instructs its reader and believer of many things;

*don’t have sex before marriage, don’t swear, don’t steal, don’t envy your neighbor

are just a few. It also instructs those who are avid followers of Jesus Christ to love their neighbor as they love themselves. Now, I know some people have self confidence issues but with the amount of absurd judgement and pure loathing I’ve seen as an outpouring from multiple “Christians” towards non Christians, those Christians must really hate themselves.

I understand that things such as homosexuality and sex before marriage are seen as sins in the eyes of Christians, but not everyone is a Christian, and not everyone has the same standpoints on certain things. This is purely an example of diversity amongst humans and religious freedoms in the United States and other countries which allow for religious freedoms.

However, when you are so consumed in your religion that your own grandson is afraid to be open with you about his homosexuality for fear of harsh judgement, and when a friend can no longer come to you with relationship problems because you don’t agree with their choice to be sexually active before marriage- I cross my fingers for your deliverance from yourself. Your religious beliefs are then tainting the relationships that you hold between close friends and family, which is repulsive.

If as a Christian you are supposed to love others, how can you claim such a title when so much of what you do is done in bitterness and hatred for “the worldly things”? How can you call yourself a Christian when you talk badly about your friends without remorse, when you find yourself wrapped up in the labels of designer clothing and tangible items that you won’t be able to carry into heaven, and when you attend church every Sunday but beat your wife and kids behind closed doors?

By golly, no one in this world is perfect, but you’d think someone professing eternal and unending love and life would try a little harder to love others unconditionally.

This past week I was talking with someone about the Supreme Court legalizing same sex marriage. I agreed with the decision. The United States are “One nation under God”, but we were founded on the idea of freedom and the liberty to partake and thrive as we please under fundamental human rights. The idea of religious freedom is that each individual that is a citizen of the United States of America should be able to practice their religion without conflict as long as it doesn’t infringe on the religious rights of another United States citizen. I told this individual that I was happy that gay marriage was legalized, as it finally gives full access to homosexuals to lead the life they find most pleasing if they wish to be married. Heterosexuals had no right to deny homosexuals this happiness. Aforementioned individual stated that a homosexual marrying would 100% infringe on the rights of other U.S. citizens, because it would cause them to think that homosexuality was ok. I found this particular statement especially humorous, as Christians also profess that “God” has given humans freedom of choice. I retorted that it isn’t the homosexuals fault if another person thinks homosexuality is “right” or “wrong” because of the freedom of choice that humans have. Just because one man is attracted to another man, doesn’t mean their intimate relationship suddenly turns into a Pokeball and turns everyone around them into flaming lesbians or gays. The last time I checked, I had freedom of choice to date guys, and my younger brother and some of my friends being attracted to members of the same sex doesn’t make me want to change my mind about my sexual orientation. Homosexuals being allowed to marry didn’t suddenly cast a spell on me that made me wake up yesterday and say “Wow, I’ll break up with my boyfriend and start seeing girls”, because quite frankly put; I DON’T LIKE VAGINA. Even so, Christians professing that homosexuality is wrong isn’t changing my mind that homosexuality is perfectly fine, so them stating that homosexuals taint homophobes beliefs is completely fucked and ignorant.

So often I see people in the church hating others and speaking terribly of their appearances or whereabouts in life, judging others moral beliefs and unfriending them because it isn’t perfectly aligned with their own. It’s when people of any religion that let their own moral codes and rules of conduct overpower their ability to cherish another being for being themself, that religion becomes a poison.

One of the most basic moral codes that I follow, is that; you don’t have to believe in the same God, or same scriptures as another person to practice the basic act of love.

A lot of Christians offer love, and it’s wonderful to see people practicing what they preach-even if they don’t agree with another’s lifestyle. But for those who fail to do this, religion itself becomes a poison, and it affects people around you negatively.

The best thing to offer a person isn’t bible verses, or bible studies, or prayer sessions or interventions. The best thing you can offer anyone is absolute unconditional love. I think we’d all be a lot happier with a whole lot more love in our hearts, minds, words, and actions.