Currently, I’m on my third round of antibiotics in the year since I was diagnosed last July.

(Yes, holy toledo. Could be worse, could be better.)

This round of antibiotics is a three month supply. To combat the nausea and sensitive bowels, I’ve been sticking with tons of greek yogurt and ginger ale/tea. In the past two weeks my sensitivity to the antiobiotics has reached an all time high and I’ve decided to be stricter about the things I’m putting into my body.

I’m a lover of gluten filled products. Give me granola, give me pasta, give me bread. I love it all. Whole wheat, white bread, covered in sauce and cheese or topping off a pile of yogurt, you name it. I know that gluten free is recommended for tons of Lymies, but I’ve resisted going full blown gluten free because I love what I eat,and I watch my intake.

My nausea has been so bad as of recent, that I’ve decided to go gluten free- at least until I am done with this round of antibiotics. Since coming home from my freshman year of college, I’ve been putting in forty hour work weeks at the pizzeria I’ve worked at since I was fifteen. I’ve had college planning things to worry about, and various other things that build up as minor stressors, but overall, I’m enjoying being home thoroughly. I don’t have time between work, friends, and the miscellaneous errands, to feel sick all the time. It was so frustrating the other night when I went to dinner and a movie with a friend, and I had to walk to the bathroom three times cause I thought I was going to be sick.

This disease is a real fucker. (Pardon my french)

I do live with my grandmother this summer, and it’s been very nice but she doesn’t understand that there are things I simply cannot put into my body on a regular basis. My major is nutrition and dietetics, so I’m very picky about what I eat anyways and she thinks that diet changes are a result of my picky and nutritious eating habits.

I don’t see a Lyme specialist, but have been looking into several around the area. Therefore, my diet isn’t nearly as particular as many other Lymies diets are.

It’s going to be tricky to cut out gluten, and cut down on other things such as caffeine, and even some processed sugars, but I know that there are far worse things that I could have to put my body through. So, in a sense- I’m grateful for the challenge!

Emotionally the Lyme has  been kinda rough lately as well. Even though mine isn’t as bad as it could be, I’m still fatigued and sick feeling frequently, which intrudes on my social life. Sometimes it’s hard not to feel like a burden to family, friends, coworkers, and even significant others. Whether it be having to have a bathroom close by, or an extra layer of clothes due to sun sensitivity, or even needing to bring a medicine container with you so that you can remember to take your meds with food, it does take a toll on you emotionally at some points. I get annoyed some days when my gram asks how I’m feeling, because I feel as if there is no point in her asking if I always feel so sick. I don’t like when she asks what kind of stomach sensitivity and other symptoms I have, because discussing it with her will do no good. I’ve learned that it’s 100% okay to get agitated when I feel sick, but that she asks because she cares, and I shouldn’t snap at those that I care about.

There was a teacher at my high school who was famous for saying “There are good days and there are great days” to students among the halls. I like to add “And there’s some pretty shitty ones” to the end of that, just for good measure. It’s not being pessimistic, it’s being realistic. I have wonderful days, and I have awful ones. Guess what?! I make it through them all, some with strides, some by the skin of my teeth.

No one deserves to be cursed with a disease like this, or any other. However, it is daily that I remind myself that it could be better, and it could be worse. That thought has helped me on so many of my rough days, and I will continue to think it every day for the rest of my life.

It is day two of being gluten free again, and day 6,500 something odd numbers of my beautiful life. There are only two months and five days left of this round of antibiotics, and I’m embracing each day with an optimistic smile, a handful of medicine, and maybe a cuss word or seven mumbled under my breath.

Follow for more updates on my battle with Lyme!

Namaste.

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